I'm remodeling my bathroom and no fittings I can find at local stores fit my shower handles or tub faucet. I'd appreciate any help identifying the make/model, or a direction where I could start looking for answers.

The bathroom was constructed probably 30+ years ago. I just remodeled and cant find the old fittings. The hot and cold valve stems are separate and end approx. 3" from where the piping T's in the wall, and 2" from the tiled wall. The fitting the stems seat in have exterior thread 1-1/4" diameter approx. 1-1/2" from the wall. The valve stem has a gear-like end, and the actual valve stem part that turns is 7/8" long.

I've tried the available Gerber and Pfister replacement handles but neither seat the valve stem. I found some universal handles that work (but ugly and not perfect), but cannot find any flanges to create a watertight seal behind the handles. What the stores have is not wide enough to pass the 1-1/4" stem. Any insight on what type of stems these are-and what handles and flanges I need to buy? I've attached photos.

Also, I'm having trouble finding a tub spout that is the right depth. The pipe for the spout extends slightly less than 1" from the wall, and is 1/2-inch threaded steel. I tried removing the pipe to replace with something longer to fit a standard 3-7/8" depth spout, but the pipe appears welded in. (When i tried turning with my wrench the pipe began to bend and cave. I stopped before irreparable damage was done.) Is there a spout that can easily fit, or do I need to just add couplers and pipe to extend?

Any insight is greatly appreciated.

Photos of hot water handle valve stem:

[imgoat.com]
[imgoat.com]

This is a Kohler Valvet shower valve. The model # would be based on the number of handles and the trim. Attached is a link to Kohler K-7004 Flair valve. In the last year Kohler has changed this stem unit from a 30002 and 30004 compression stem to 330002 and 330004 ceramic stem. These are still common valves.

[www.us.kohler.com];

yeah, as my friend from FL says.. kohler is the brand and you are looking at
these type parts.
print this picture and bring to a plumbing supply house that carries kohler brand fixtures.